At least I am up and out of bed because I think it was last Tuesday when I laid down and I actually got up yesterday started moving around and today I feel a lot better. Considering where I was at yesterday. Found this great new bands I do not remember how, but they are called “Young the Giant” and I primarily listen the country hundred percent except on my DirecTV box, that is, Channel 856 I believe in is called New Age, and I think actually it is called Sonic Tap. But they have got amazing music on that station and then finding these guys on the Internet this morning like I said I do not remember how, but I just did there their genres of music and their rhythm, I think they sound great.

Next figure out why this keeps happening, only going along okay for about 4 to 6 weeks maybe. And all of a sudden I and the sleeping or not sleeping, but I am in bed for a week, I choose not to eat and I do not take my pills that I am supposed to. I take 10 different pills within the day, some of them or once a day and some of them are four times a day. I did notice though, that if I am out in the evening, there are mosquitoes, they will not bite me because my blood is too toxic for them, ha ha. At least I am joking now and I am in better spirits, because I have had spirits, but I just am.

I have really been thinking about getting back into my artwork, and I mean in the hard and I have been having these visions of some amazing stuff, but it is a matter of getting it put together to produce it or them or what ever. I have also been having another vision and this one’s not really cool at all. I am not going to describe it, but his vision has been making me ill at the thought of it and I do not know where in the hell it came from, so that is all you need to know about that. I did have a couple of dreams. While I was awake, almost like a flashback. I guess you would say if you are awake, and that was when the mirror went through my arm. I have been going over and over in my head as to how that had happened on that dreadful day of 07/22/2008, that ripped my world apart.

I got involved with building and installing cabinets into kitchens, bathrooms and building entertainment centers and putting it all together and everything from a mobile home to 6000 foot single-family dwellings where we put in a 10 foot oak entertainment centers and vanities and the TV behind the mirror, and huge desks and having a solid wood top where you cannot even see the seams turning the corners, that was how flawless my team was. It took me a lot of years to find something that I truly love and to have it ripped away from me in the blink of an eye.

So over the next six months after the injury, I lost everything, the house I had been living in was beautiful, gone. The guys I have worked with had to work so they went elsewhere because I could not do anything. Construction business is brutal in the first the place, then one gets into a position where one cannot even pick up a sheet of plywood or even pick up a basic 20 ounce framing hammer, let alone get into the finer details of the actual finish work.

Well, I think I am done the dictating for now, I think my Dragon is tired because it is slacking on a number of commands. So I am going to turn her off, yes I have been married three times I know how to do that, ha ha. After about a half an hour I will turn her back on, after three divorces, maybe I do not know how to do that. 

Thank you for listening, you are all I have two talk to, so I Love You and we will talk more later.

Caio

happy Mother’s Day to all my friends and family, I wish only the best for you on this cherished day of yours. Shall you be treated as you desire, loved and pampered as you are deserved. May your offspring worship you even more on this day and abide by your calling. Shall your mate beckin you at your every command. one final wish for you on this day and that is to just enjoy and not stress it, I hope your loved ones and family adheres to my wish…

Well, I had my surgery almost a week ago, and if it was not for my daughter being there; I do not know how I would have been able of handled it. The pain that it caused me with them going back into my neck, for the fourth time, was so unbearable, but I do have to admit it, it was not near as bad as it was last year, when they went into my neck to replace a defective implant. So that made the third time they were in my neck from 9/29/10 to 3/18/11, my body had no time to heal after that one.

So unless they are going to put something else back into my neck, they should be done for now. Now it is just a matter of waiting for them to work on my hand and forearm. To begin with, I do not know how they are going to start to figure out what they are going to do, because they have had almost four years to decide on that and they have not told me about anything they have decided on, if anything.

All of this talk about my neck this and my neck that, my neck is not the issue. The problem is with my hand and forearm, it always has been and always will be. Other than the emotional bullshit that they are putting me through. Between the amount of nerve damage that was done, and leaving the wound open for four days, there was actually more damage done to me after the accident then from the accident. As the way I believe it anyway.

All right, now I am feeling a little better after venting and I want to thank you for listening. So I am going to get back to my other work/homework.

Caio

PS, check out my artwork at http://fineartamerica.com/profiles/1-kip-vidrine.html

and let me know what you think.

Yep, I have three more days until my surgery and this waiting is just killing me. I’m just going nuts not being able to focus on anything because everything revolves around Friday. Actually Everything revolves around the results on Friday.I have so much work to do from class and I just cannot focus, I don’t know how many essays I have to write, two alone at 250 words, one at 350 minimum, and I think two additional at 500 or more.plus that isn’t counting the work I have to do each day, that I haven’t been able to finish, Shit! All right now here I go again, giving it another shot, focus focus focus focus focus

I have been sitting here at my computer and I cannot get a single thing accomplished today. My hand is hurting in so many different ways it’s hard to really describe it, if it isn’t just the initial crushing sensation that I’ve been feeling for almost 4 years that is bothering me, then I am also getting these sensations of a jolt through my fingers or into my whole arm and I’m not sure what’s causing it, but it’s been going on for some time where all of a sudden my whole body jumps, like it’s been hit with some form of an electrical connection, and the other day I got zapped so hard from whatever this is, that I ended up kicking over my trashcan, and jamming my toes into my desk, and knocking stuff over across might desktop. It happens all the time, you could almost look at it as if it is like these earthquakes, sometimes there small and the epicenters not that big and it’s not that deep and then other times it’s massive and out-of-control.

so with all of that going on in my arm and my hand actually throughout my whole body unworried about the surgery and having on Friday, so nervous wreck and I just don’t know what to do. I can even get 250 words put down my screen slightly get these assignments done.

Well, I guess I better give it another shot, running out of time, fast.

I will catch you all later

Getting hot outside, more so every day, I think we had about 2 or maybe 3 days of spring

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