Coming Back Around…

Well, I had my surgery almost a week ago, and if it was not for my daughter being there; I do not know how I would have been able of handled it. The pain that it caused me with them going back into my neck, for the fourth time, was so unbearable, but I do have to admit it, it was not near as bad as it was last year, when they went into my neck to replace a defective implant. So that made the third time they were in my neck from 9/29/10 to 3/18/11, my body had no time to heal after that one.

So unless they are going to put something else back into my neck, they should be done for now. Now it is just a matter of waiting for them to work on my hand and forearm. To begin with, I do not know how they are going to start to figure out what they are going to do, because they have had almost four years to decide on that and they have not told me about anything they have decided on, if anything.

All of this talk about my neck this and my neck that, my neck is not the issue. The problem is with my hand and forearm, it always has been and always will be. Other than the emotional bullshit that they are putting me through. Between the amount of nerve damage that was done, and leaving the wound open for four days, there was actually more damage done to me after the accident then from the accident. As the way I believe it anyway.

All right, now I am feeling a little better after venting and I want to thank you for listening. So I am going to get back to my other work/homework.


PS, check out my artwork at

and let me know what you think.

Tuesday, May 1 and I have three more days

Yep, I have three more days until my surgery and this waiting is just killing me. I’m just going nuts not being able to focus on anything because everything revolves around Friday. Actually Everything revolves around the results on Friday.I have so much work to do from class and I just cannot focus, I don’t know how many essays I have to write, two alone at 250 words, one at 350 minimum, and I think two additional at 500 or that isn’t counting the work I have to do each day, that I haven’t been able to finish, Shit! All right now here I go again, giving it another shot, focus focus focus focus focus


I have been sitting here at my computer and I cannot get a single thing accomplished today. My hand is hurting in so many different ways it’s hard to really describe it, if it isn’t just the initial crushing sensation that I’ve been feeling for almost 4 years that is bothering me, then I am also getting these sensations of a jolt through my fingers or into my whole arm and I’m not sure what’s causing it, but it’s been going on for some time where all of a sudden my whole body jumps, like it’s been hit with some form of an electrical connection, and the other day I got zapped so hard from whatever this is, that I ended up kicking over my trashcan, and jamming my toes into my desk, and knocking stuff over across might desktop. It happens all the time, you could almost look at it as if it is like these earthquakes, sometimes there small and the epicenters not that big and it’s not that deep and then other times it’s massive and out-of-control.

so with all of that going on in my arm and my hand actually throughout my whole body unworried about the surgery and having on Friday, so nervous wreck and I just don’t know what to do. I can even get 250 words put down my screen slightly get these assignments done.

Well, I guess I better give it another shot, running out of time, fast.

I will catch you all later

My most stressful week yet

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This is day one, (Monday) of week nine in my humanities class with the University of Phoenix. This also means that it is finals week and I still have more work from last week. Not only do I have that piling up on me, I have to go in for surgery on my neck Friday morning and this will be the fourth time the same surgeon as been into my neck, the same spot at as the other three times and this time will hopefully be the last. Is removing the implant he put him originally on September 29 of 2010. Plus this time he is also going to take out the battery and a wire that runs from the battery to my neck, I imagine you want to know where the battery is, well it is in my left butt cheek and kind of high but just below my belt line. I have to tell you that area has been hurting more and more lately maybe because of the way have been sitting or laying down I just need to get it out. I handed arm has been just in so much pain lately that I can’t even concentrate on reading for pleasure let alone for my schoolwork.

One thing I did though yesterday that was kind of fun, and that was it took some of my drawings that I had done and propped up and took out my camera and took some new photos of them and downloaded them onto my computer. So after a little bit of cropping I’m going to post them on my webpage with the website “”.

Well I’ve been putting it off long enough, and I’ve only got a few days this week to get my homework done, well till Friday morning anyway.

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